Sunday, July 31, 2016
At any given point since this time last year, I could look out 2-3 weeks and see relief, but as those days and weeks ticked by the next large hurdle would become apparent.
The past few weeks I've become bone weary in the core, and have been nagged by headaches and other physical manifestations of long stress. The heat and humidity hasn't helped my mood either; summer is by far my least favorite season and July my least favorite month. I'm very much looking forward to the dry, crisp mornings of Fall and the first frost.
This weekend offered a welcome escape. Mrs. Durden had a planned trip with friends out of town this weekend, so I've been a bachelor the past few days. When she asked me what I intended to accomplish in her absence, I responded simply, "sleep." I wasn't kidding, she knew I wasn't kidding, and that in itself was funny enough that we both laughed.
I managed to leave work early on Thursday to work from home for a few hours (still legit "work" but I was out of the office doing email in shorts and a t-shirt), and on Friday I expended some vacation time and came home early. Other than a touch of yard work and a load of dishes, I've not done much over the past 48 hours. It's been a welcome escape. I've written some fiction, watched a few movies, and tinker with some game titles that I haven't messed with in ages (GW2, Starcraft2, and even a bit of EVE).
Whatever guilt I felt for not tackling one of the dozen or so projects awaiting my attention here at the house has been pushed away by the notion that we expend a vast amount of effort and rarely truly take time to enjoy the house, property, and neighborhood for what it is. I'm always doing something, going somewhere, and thinking about 20 things I should be doing next. Just sitting on my ass doing nothing has been a different experience and the hours of the day have stretched and become longer; weekends are usually gone in a blink but this particular weekend has felt stretched and time has moved slower.
So here's my advice: grab a drink and sit down. The world can wait a day.
Monday, July 11, 2016
Where the heck have I been?
Following the BDR, I let myself unravel a bit. I normally live a very structured life, with certain days for certain chores or workouts, and fitting EVE in whenever there's a hole. After months (years?) of this cycle, it was time for a pause. I didn't do it intentionally, but it's been a month already. I haven't been on the bike since BDR, haven't been to a gym, and haven't been booting the PC as regularly.
What online time I've been consuming has generally been in Overwatch. Which is a fun and meaningless time consumer. But even then, I think I went 5 nights last week without any time on the home PC. My infatuation with Overwatch has been sated, and I think the headaches I've had recently are related.
The time away from my (ab)normal routine has been welcome, and I don't think I'll return to it completely. It has been nice to be a normal guy for a few weeks without the pull from either the online world or the bike seat. So, this is how the muggles live?
This isn't my first time through a sprint-and-coast cycle, and won't be the last. Experience has shown that there's no cause for alarm. It's just time to relax a bit, take stock of things, pick new goals, and set out again.
As always, there are things to do in EVE that I could tackle, space to explore, and resources to collect. But while the weather stays mild and bug free, it's going to be nicer to spend time on the deck in the evenings and soak in a little bit of 'normal.'
"Everything that has a beginning has an end." That's one of my favorite quotes from the Matrix 2. It has to do with the ...