Thursday, December 31, 2015

Forever Forward

A year ago I wrote a resolutions post.  I was rubbish at my goals.  As in, truly hideously bad.  There are some good and compelling reasons for this, and I don't see 2015 as a "failure" by any stretch.  All it really means is that the year took a severe left turn in early Spring and I never had a hope of returning to the course that I thought I was going to be on.

But that doesn't mean I didn't have an interesting year.

Work sucked worse in 2015 than it did in 2014, as in "sucked so bad I quit and started over." I miss the old job (as in the actual product and tasking) and old crew (as in my local team) but am now in a much better place for both stability and professional growth.  And while the new gig is a good deal for me, it also comes with the bonus of not working for fools, liars, and assholes.  Bonus points.

In terms of bikes and triathlons, 2015 was a year of rebuilding.  The Imperial Century still eluded me.  With the lack of clear weather (and 2x the normal lawn mowing), I was well off the training curve to even think about attempting a long ride of any flavor.  But my lower back held strong, and I regained much of my lost stamina.  I found a great indoor training video for hill climbs and my consistency on hilly bike courses improved dramatically.  I am still not fast, but I am more consistent.

I started the year planning to compete in maybe 1 sanctioned race.  Instead, I completed 3 multi-sport races (more than any other year) - one sprint tri and two Olympic distance swim/bike events.  I track everything I do in a big spreadsheet, and I can say that I biked more than 2014 (but not as much as 2013).  I also swam more yards this year than any other year in my life.

It was a good year for EVE.  My isk balance is way up, higher than it's ever been by double the amount it was a year ago. I am not rich, but I do ok,  I have a hanger full of ships, and I flew more new hulls this year than I really expected to.  I got around to some areas of space I've not been to in ages.  Thanks to the anomic agents, I also lost more ships this year than any other, which is actually a healthy thing in the big picture.  EVE Vegas was a great time, and the PVE content I've wanted for awhile has continued to be deployed.

Forever Forward.

Time marches on relentlessly; it pauses for no man.

I don't have many discrete goals for 2016.  If anything, 2015 reminded me that life isn't nearly that predictable.

What I find myself wanting is more.

More time. More miles on the bike.  More laps at the pool. More evenings splitting wood and burning brush.  More time repairing grandad's tractors.  More afternoons running agents, incursions, and trading trinkets.  More time for offshoots like GW2.  More time with family.  More Saturdays quietly at home.  More trips across the country.  More vacation days spent at home.  More progress, less conflict.

So what I should beg for is more focus.  The ability to say "no" decisively yet gracefully.  The insight to understand that if I indulge all tasks then all suffer equally.  I should beg for the wisdom to know which things to ignore, which people to disappoint, and to which I should give attention.  To allow that establishing priorities means that many things simply can't and won't get done.

So what's my goal for 2016?  To get SOME things done and let the rest wait, and to be at peace with that.

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